Through out our lives we are always it seems striving to live up to someone elses  expectation of us.  As children its our parents, growing up its our peers, you get married and its your spouse, if your single its potential suitors.  What we forget is living up to our own expectations, what we can do for us to make our lives better.  Sure those mentioned may be integral parts of our lives but when it really comes down to it, they're not the one who lives  your life.

We need to think about what we can do for ourselves to make our lives the best it can be....We are always going to have those who live to bring us down, but what makes us the better people is standing up for OURSELVES and saying I am proud of me, I may not be perfect but I am PERFECTLY ME!!!!

Forgive a Bully?

We, as overweight children, have most likely had someone bully us at some point.  However messed up it is, I consider myself lucky that other than one guy who strove to make my life hell, only a handful of people had the guts to say something about my weight. 

In middle school there was one boy, who made it his mission to make me feel badly about myself.  To be perfectly honest...  it didn't really have that much more of an affect than anyone else picking on me... until one day, that is.  He sat behind me in a class, and took it upon himself to write, in marker, "I love food" on my shirt.  A friend of mine told me it was there, and I remember walking down the hall to the principal's office praying and wishing nobody would see me, and see it.  I don't remember what I did the rest of the day about the shirt... maybe I put a jacket on...but I remember the humiliation I felt like it was yesterday.  So while I forgave him, the memory of the pain it caused lingers.

 I had found a friend from high school on fb.  Turns out she got married to the bully.  I considered unfriending her when I found out, but realized she was never a bully and always accepted me, rolls of fat and all.  Maybe a week later, in my inbox, was a message from the bully himself, with a sincere apology for how he treated me.  It really was heartfelt, and I told him it was a long time ago, and people change.  I also told him that I am not the same person I was, and I would not want to be judged based on the person I was 20 years ago.  And my forgiveness was sincere.  I am not one to keep someone from moving on in thier own lives, so I gave him absolution, but his apology brought back painful memories.  While I forgave him, the memory of the pain it caused lingered.

The current events on fb have me thinking about bullies, and being bullied.  Is bullying forgivable?  And do the scars of being bullied ever go away?  For me, bullying is forgivable...  I did forgive my bully, completely and legitimatley.  The scars of being bullied?  I am not sure, but I think that when someone is surrounded by more love than hate, more support than put-downs, and more strength than weakness, the scars and affects of being bullied fade.  Everytime someone builds you up, the scar becomes less.  Once you get to the place where you understand that your self-worth and value as a person comes from your person...you let go of what other people have told you to feel about yourself.  If you want to forgive someone that hurt you, find something unique and amazing about youself, and keep finding things.  Never stop finding excuses to love yourself, and NOBODY will ever make you feel disrespected again because you will have enough respect for you, for the entire world. 

Who has real weight Issue?

We hear it all time people who say we have weight issues?  Really I think its those who point it out that have the real weight issue.  How many times do we have to hear it "You'd look really pretty if you just lost some weight!!" I'd like to turn to them and say no matter how much you lost you'd still be an ass!!  I've had a overweight since puberty, and really and truly my downfall has been soda pop.  Sure sometimes I could stand to eat a little bit less but who hasn't.  In high school i was an outsider and struggled to find my place I never did find it.  High School guys can be so cruel, but I think back to then and really most of them did it to fit in or to make themselves look good in front of their buddies.  I've struggled with my weight but for the most part I have not hated my body, hated my weight but not my body I've not had issue with it that others have....my body isn't perfect but that's OK who wants to be perfect anyway!!!!

Who we are and what we're about

We are a group of BIG men and women who are done being silent about the discrimination and hate we face. We are ready to be BOLD